|
Friday, January 29, 2010
Characteristics of Success - 'Greatness' - Part 4In our continuing series on 'Characteristics of Success' we
have been exploring the term or quality of 'Greatness'. We have been looking at the term 'Greatness'
through the lives of two men, Gene Evans and Don Duso. So far in our discussion, we have looked at two attributes
of these men's lives; 'Service and Humility'. (Re-read the three previous posts to understand these
aspects more completely.)
Today, I would like to
conclude our look at the aspects of 'Greatness' by looking at the quality of 'Faith'.
I would like to explore this attribute from the vantage point of the 'faith' I observed in
both Gene and Don's lives. This 'faith' was a cornerstone of their lives and impacted how they
lived and conducted themselves on a day-today basis.
Before we look at the term 'faith' I
want to share some thoughts to set the groundwork for the rest of this post. Even trying to 'attempt' to write or capture
a term like 'faith' and it's implications to a person's life is an arduous task. I will say up-front
I won't do it justice and will apologize for my 'ineptness' as we continue. Now I know, the term 'faith'
can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people but lets give it a whirl anyway!
To set the stage
for our discussion I have to take you back to Christmas of this year and a gift I got from my dear friend Cheryl. Cheryl
and I have known each other for 20 years or so and although we don't see or talk to each other that much, we've always been
able to maintain our friendship. Since we met there have been several binding aspects to our friendship: A love of Country
Music, a good glass of wine, a good cigar and a 'deep, personal faith in God'.
Cheryl sent me a book
for Christmas that I have not only enjoyed reading but have read and re-read four or five times. The book is called:
'the furious longing of God' and it is by Brennan Manning. Brennan had me hooked
with his thoughts from the first page, it reads:
"I'm
Brennan. I'm an alcoholic. How I got there, why I left there, why I went back, is the story of my life. But it is not the
whole story."
"I'm Brennan. I'm a Catholic. How I got there,
why I left there, why I went back, is also the story of my life. But it is not the whole story."
" I'm Brennan. I was a priest, but am no longer a priest. I was a married man but am no longer a married man. How I got
to those places, is the story of my life too. But it is not the whole story."
"I'm Brennan. I'm a sinner, saved by grace. That is the larger and more important story. Only God, in His fury, knows
the whole of it."
This is one of the few books I've read that took a deeply candid, deeply
honest look into the ups and downs of life and how those ups and downs relate to 'faith'. Now, some
of you are asking/thinking: What does this have to do with Gene Evans and Don Duso. Let me connect the concepts and I'll start
with Gene.
I grew up in Pennsylvania and attended a Lutheran Church in my home town. Gene also attended this church
and remained an active member until his death. Faith was very important to Gene in all areas of his life. In high school he
used to host the monthly meetings of the 'Fellowship of Christian Athletes' at his home and he would lead our discussion.
Young men attended who were from every walk of life and at every point along their individual 'faith' journeys.
Now what is interesting about Gene is this: He was the toughest Coach I ever played for.....he could curse with the best
of them.....he would yell, scream, threaten you with extra laps and was the most competitive man I've ever been around......yet....
that wasn't the whole story.......One of the aspects that drew people
to Coach was that underneath it all......you knew he cared deeply for you as a person. Even though he was competitive and
wanted us to do our best and 'win'.......he also understood where the 'sport' of basketball fit in the big scope of life.......He
was a man of 'faith'.
Don Duso led a different life: He was born and raised in
the little town of Saranac Lake and took over the marina his grandfather owned and ran. Don was a tough business man......a
hard negotiator.......divorced......re-married......second wife died......re-married again..... yet...... that
wasn't the whole story.......Don was a man of 'faith'.
I shared
in an earlier post about how moved I was as Pastor Mark Demers shared about Don at the funeral. Don came to 'faith' in Christ
five years ago and was baptized in the lake right beside the church. Mark went on to say that Don and his wife Cherie were
active members and that Don lived his 'faith' in a quiet way. I was also moved to hear the other
people from his church share stories of how Don lived and acted upon his 'faith'. The out-pouring of love from his church
and our local community was amazing and deeply moving..... Don was a lot of things......but, he was a man of 'faith'.
Why have I shared these thoughts about these two men and their respective 'faith'. I guess because when I think
of the word 'Greatness'.....I think the basis of true Greatness lies in one's 'faith' and that 'faith'
in turn impacts the other areas of our lives including, 'service and humility'.
Now,
I want/need to say this; I'm not here to promote a church, religion or creed. All I'm here to do is share about the importance
of 'faith' in today's life and world. If you aren't a person of 'faith'
or are struggling with your faith amidst life's challenges, why not pick up a copy of Brennan Manning's book and read it.....or
dust off that old copy of the Bible you have and just start reading a few pages each day starting with the Gospel of John.....either
would be a good way to start or re-kindle your 'faith' journey.
Folks, I would
also like to say that I have made more mistakes in my life than anyone should probably be allowed to make.....I've made
bad choices.....I've not been the best Dad sometimes......I've hurt other people with my words and actions.......yet.....for
Holland.....that isn't the whole story. With all my failures and shortcomings
my 'faith in God' is very important to me and no matter how many things I've done wrong and how
many times I've failed........I know this for a FACT.......it isn't the
whole story for Holland and I'm comforted in the knowledge that I am surrounded by the 'furious
love of God' ...........and for that my friends, I am so very thankful!
Good luck on your 'faith'
journey and please know......no matter what you've been through and how you may have 'failed'......it
isn't YOUR whole story either!
As always, thanks for listening/reading and until next time
remember to: 'Dream Big and Dare to Fail!'
11:31 am est
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Characteristics of Success - 'Greatness' - Part 3In our continuing series on 'Characteristics of Success' we
began to explore the term or quality of 'Greatness'. We have been looking at the term 'Greatness'
through the lives of two men, Gene Evans and Don Duso. I would like to continue our exploration of this topic by
examining another attribute of these men's lives; today, I
would like to look at the quality of 'Humility'.
Besides being 'Service'
oriented (Read the post from January 25th) both Gene Evans and Don Duso also demonstrated an honest and refreshing
'Humility' that I believe is greatly lacking into today's world. I used to be a 'sports' nut.....I
would watch sports on TV and had my favorite teams in the NBA, NFL and MLB and would follow them closely. I would be happy
when they won and sad or angry when they lost.......then something began to happen in professional sports.......the ego's
started to overtake the game.
Early on it seemed to me that players played sports for one reason; the shear 'LOVE
of the game and being part of a team. When the NFL started most of the players had 'real' jobs that paid their bills as opposed
to there sport paying them enough to pay all there bills. (Now before some of you sports 'nuts' get your underwear-in-a-bunch,
I think athletes should be compensated at a 'fair' market value and don't begrudge them getting paid big bucks.)
With the above-statement being said something slowly began to change in the sports world. It seems the 'ego's' of
the players seem to be growing exponentially bigger than their pay-checks. All of a sudden it wasn't about the 'team' anymore
but was about them individually. We've all heard the statement that says something like: 'Don't believe all the positive headlines
written about you.' Well it seems that over the years, players not only believed their own 'hype' but propagated the hype.
Now players 'hold-out' for more money, sacrificing the team for their own financial benefit. Whole groups
of players would go 'on-stirke' and complain of 'not being treated fairly'.......fairly......you're playing a game for
pete's sake! When the baseball players went on stirke several years ago I wish the owners would have done what President Reagan
did with the Airline Traffic Controllers.......FIRE THEM ALL!!!!!
There I said It!.....'Fire
Them ALL'.....let those guys go out and drive a cab for a living and see how 'famous' they are then.....bring up
the 'minor' league players.....players who have worked for years just for a shot at the big leagues. Yes for a few years the
'talent' may not have been great....but you know what.....before long they would be great and we would have 'new stars'.
And hopefully, the 'new' stars would not forget their struggle and battle to get to where they are........and hopefully,
they would conduct themselves with 'humility'!
I don't hardly watch any sports anymore......When I watch
a small portion of an NFL game I become bothered at the 'Ego's'. A team could be getting beat 48 to 0 and someone on the losing
team; a defensive lineman finally sacks the quarterback or a receiver catches the ball and then they turn to the stands, make
some gesture, do a dance, like they're a 'bad' man......buddy......your team is getting hammered.....do your job
and be quiet.
Well I better get off my 'soapbox' before I have an aneurysm. Now again folks, I know there are plenty
of athletes that go about their business and are humble in their mannerisms.....I know that......it seems though, that today
they are more the exception than the rule. You are probably now saying what has this got to do with Greatness,
the attribute of 'humility' and Gene Evans and Don Duso.
I want to connect these thoughts by
telling two stories; the first is about Don. At Don Duso's funeral I was touched by Rev. Mark Demers 'sermon/tribute' to Don.
He shared that Don had come to 'Christ' five years ago and that he had the honor of baptizing him in the lake by the
church. Pastor Demers went on to say that Don was actively involved with church but always conducted himself in a 'quiet,
humble' way.....He couldn't sing a lick but would sing anyway........he was always willing to lend a hand where he was
able. That 'attitude' was also noticed as Don served our local community in the Fire Department and 'Winter Carnival'.
I observed at certain events, Don being 'forced' because of his responsibilities/position to be in front of the crowd
but you could always tell he preferred to help behind the scenes in a quiet way.
Now onto Gene Evans: When I was
a high school senior we had a pretty good basketball team. The five of us that started had played together since grade school
and had dreamed of all starting together our senior year. We had a record of 17 wins and one loss. (The one loss we did
have was an away game, and when they came to 'OUR COURT' we crushed them.) Now we were playing my last 'home' game of the
season and we wanted to be 'undefeated' at home.
In this last game we were playing in front of a 'packed' house
of probably 2000 wildly screaming partisan fans. We didn't play well in this game but it was back and forth the whole game.
It is now the end of the game; there are six seconds left on the clock, the score is tied 40/40 and it is our ball going the
length of the court.
Coach Evans called a 'timeout' and we devised a play. We were going to throw the ball to
me at half-court and I would quickly call another 'time-out'. In the second 'time-out' we would devise a half-court play and
we knew we would make the last shot and 'win' the ball game. Before we broke the huddle Coach told me to go 'inform' the head
referee what our plans were; to bring the ball to half-court and then call another 'time-out'. (The genius of Coach Evans
was he wanted to put the thought in the Ref's mind of another 'time-out' so he may blow the whistle just a little early and
give us more time for our last play and shot......what a basketball mind he had!)
I went and told the 'Ref' what
we were going to do and then the next six-seconds unfolded in 'slow-motion'. I broke from three-quarter court to half-court
and our guard threw the ball from the far end-line to me. As I watched the ball come, it was starting to 'rise' a little and
I jumped to catch it. It was coming hard and I tried to trap the ball with my hands against my shoulder when I was jumping.
The ball hit me on the shoulder blade and bounced through my hands. The ball bounced once at half-court and I tried desperately
to recover it. As I reached for the bouncing ball one of the opposing teams guards snatched it on the bounce, took one
dribble and left the shot fly from half-court.
I watched in 'slow-motion' as the ball swished through the net as
time expired and we lost our only and last game at home. I was devastated and walked dejectedly into the loccer room.......overwhelmed
with emotion that I had lost our last game at home as a senior, I began to cry. When I got into the locker room I heard Coach
Evans' voice calling me into his office. I was crying, head down and now felt like I was going to be yelled at for losing
the game. When I entered his office with my head down he took his hand and popped me under the chin and said 'Look at me!'
I looked up, tears in my eyes and there was coach looking me right square in the eye. He then said: 'I have one
question for you: Did you tell the referee that we wanted the second 'time-out' when the ball came into half-court?' I said:
'Yes sir I did!' Coach then said: 'I wanted to know because I felt you handled the ball long enough at half-court that we
should've gotten the second time-out.'
He then looked deep into my eyes and said: 'Holland, an individual never
loses a 'team' game. We lost that ball game well before you dropped the ball. We lost it on the turnovers we committed, the
free throws we missed, the rebounds we didn't get and the misc uncontested shots we blew. An individual never loses a team
game......You've had a great career.....now when you leave here, you hold your head high and look people square in the eye.
We lost this game......you didn't! Now, hold your head up, go shower and get out of here!
Both Gene and Don had a wonderful way about them. They weren't 'ego' driven but instead were service oriented
men who went about their ways handling life and their responsibilities with a confident humility.
This my friends, is a quality I feel is sorely lacking in today's world. I am thankful and blessed to have had my life cross
paths with both of these men. I hope I can live my life and replicate in my day-to-day living, the qualities they exhibited......especially
the qualities of 'service and humility'.
On Friday I will share one more thought about
these men and our look at 'Greatness'. I hope you will think about what I've just shared and realize what
a blessing we all have, and I hope we all will 'serve others with humility'.
As
always, thanks for listening/reading and remember, until next time: 'Dream Big and Dare to Fail!'
12:44 pm est
Monday, January 25, 2010
Characteristics of Success - 'Greatness' - Part 2In our continuing series on 'Characteristics of Success' we
began to explore the term or quality of 'Greatness' . I shared about two recent 'losses' in
my life, of men who I feel exhibited in their day-to-day lives, the qualities of 'Greatness'. Now I would like to continue
our exploration of this topic by asking this question: What made these men's lives, GREAT?
In order to answer that
question I want to again share how Webster defined 'Greatness'. 'Greatness': noteworthy, weighty, serious, momentous, vital, critical, famed, eminent,
noted, notable, prominent, renowned, elevated, exalted, dignified.
In
the next several posts I want to explore a few characteristics that I feel, made these men great. Today, I
would like to look at the quality I'm calling, 'Service'. Both Gene Evans and Don Duso
were 'service' oriented men. (Yes they both 'served' in our armed forces but I'm talking about their 'lifelong
service' to others.)
In today's 'me' oriented society the characteristic or quality of service seems to
be greatly missing or at least greatly dimished. It seems like today's mantra is to look after ourselves and ourselves
only. I don't necessarily know how or why this has happened but in some ways it seems 'generational'. My mom and dad's generation
seemed very 'service' oriented. My mom was part of the garden club, volunteered at her church and did other
'service' type work. The same was true of my dad; he was a lifelong member of several different community 'service' type
clubs.
Somehow, this quality seems to have gotten lost or at least 'mis-placed' in my and subsequent generations.
I'm not saying there aren't examples out there, but I think comparatively speaking, they are fewer than in previous times.
(I was talking with my cousin Sally recently and she commented about how the attribute of 'service' just
seemed to be bread into our parents and their generation but seems to be lacking in our generation and these current times.
I think of it this way; it's kind of like: Chivalry.....not dead....but dying on the vine......not as prevalent as it once
was....smile  )
In some of my earlier 'posts' we discussed the characteristic of 'passion'. Both Gene and Don had a 'passion'
around service to others.
Gene dedicated his life to 'teaching and coaching'. The number of young people's lives
that were touched and changed by Gene as an educator and as a coach would be hard to number. I recently talked with one of
my high-school basketball teammates informing him of Gene's death. He was at a loss for words but shared: 'Men like Gene
are never supposed to die!' (That is the impact he had on his life and many others.)
I read several articles
that were published in the paper after Gene's death and one of the qualities that people who were interviewed consistently
shared was this: 'He cared for others......as a teacher......as a coach......it wasn't just about 'winning'....he cared for
you as a person.' I could go on and on with different stories about his impact on my life but I will capture it
this way: 'Gene spent his life in service to others!'
The same can be said for Don Duso. Although Don was a business
man in our community and not an 'educator or coach', service to others was a very important part of his life. Don volunteered
as a fireman in our community for over 50 years and was the 'Fire Chief' for many of those years. Don was also actively involved
in service during what we who live in this area call; 'Winter Carnival'. Winter in the north country can be very long so to
combat those long winter months our community has a 'two-week' party mid-winter. Every February, as a town we have a celebration which
is called: Winter Carnival.
There are all types of events during the carnival, like snowshoe softball, tubing
at our little local ski mountain, ski races, ice skating shows, a parade and of course, the building of an 'Ice Palace' out
of the ice cut from our local lake. I'll post a photo of the Palace in another week or so when it is cpmpleted. (You can also visit
www.SaranacLakeWinterCarnival.com to get an idea of the event) Don served as the Chairman of our Winter Carnival committee for over twenty years.
Both endeavors, the fire department and Winter Carnival are not paid positions. They are all volunteer or 'service'
positions. Can you imagine over the years how many people have enjoyed the festivities of Winter Carnival and how
many additional lives have been touched through Don's service in and on the fire department......can you imagine!
I need to tell one more 'Don Duso' story. Five years ago my mother who now lives in Dallas was living up here for
the summer. One Sunday morning I was leaving church and saw the ambulance coming up the street. There was something weird
that happened and here's what I mean: As I passed the ambulance I 'knew' it was going to get my mom. I instictively turned
around and went back in the direction the ambulance had gone. A couple minutes later, sure enough, there was the ambulance
in front of another local church, attending to my mom. She had come out of church that morning, the sun was very bright
and before she could get her sunglasses on, she missed a step coming out of church, fell and broke her hip.
To make a long story short; she was transported to our local hospital and had surgery. After the surgery and some 'in-hospital'
re-hab mom was transferred to a longer term care unit. It's funny now but it wasn't then......my mom lasted one night.....one.....she
hated the place and called at 5 AM demanding to get her out of there. Well, we had no way to transport my mom with her new
hip and all the other things that went along with it........but I knew one thing.....we had to get her out of there.... and
quick. All it took was a call to Mr. Duso......Don initially said: 'Technically we can't transport her unless we have a doctor's
orders or it is an emergency.'
After explaining to Don the 'nature' of this emergency.....(And folks......if you
knew my mom......it was an emergency......now smile Mom......I Love You!) A couple minutes after the call, Don and his
crew were at the facility picking up my mom and bringing her back to my house for the rest of her re-cooperation. That was
just the kind of man Don was.... he was 'service' oriented to his core!
When I think of 'Greatness'
and how I would define that characteristic, one of the words I would have to use is 'service' to
others. Both of these men had that attribute as a part of their 'life-stamp'. The high school gym in Carlisle PA, where I
played all my home basketball games was re-named the 'Gene A. Evans Gymnasium'. This year's 2010 Winter Carnival is dedicated
to Don Duso for all his years of service.
Why am I sharing this, I guess for several reasons: In looking at
Characteristics of Success and the word 'Greatness', I think one of the true definitions
of 'Greatness' is 'service to others'. The other reason is very simple.....to challenge
all who read this to incorporate 'service to others' into our daily lives.
If you are all
ready making a difference by 'serving others' in some volunteer capacity....congratulations and thank you......if
you're not.... start to think of an area that needs help.......and you know what......maybe, just maybe.......YOU may
be just the right person for the job.
In our next post we will continue exploring the attributes of greatness.
Until then, as always, thanks for listening/reading and remember to: 'Dream Big and Dare to Fail!'
11:04 am est
|
